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Tuesday, December 13, 2011

well said.

An open letter to God,


This morning you decided that my grandma was needed more in heaven then here with us, you seem like a smart guy so we will trust in your decision. However, you should be aware of a couple things before my grandma gets to you.

1) You best have heaven in tip-top shape. My grandma likes things to be neat and tidy and will get upset with you if you leave stuff sitting around and/or forget to turn off lights when you leave a room.

2) You had better have a nice selection of wine and a bunch of steaks in the freezer. Maybe some fresh veggies as well. She really likes good food, especially steaks and potatoes and pie.

3) If there is baseball up there, she is a huge cubs fan, so, make the heaven version of the cubs be real good please.

4) She will need either a library card or access to a selection of books, so she can read a book, have a glass of wine and sit by the window looking out at the lake.

5) Speaking of lakes, set her up in a nice cabin in the woods by a nice quiet lake. Have some loons and ducks hanging out and in the winter months you can have some deer hang out as well. She also likes to have bird feeders around as well.

Long story short, my grandma is awesome so you better be prepared when she gets there, because she deserves the best. If you don't hook her up, we are going to here about it and get irritated and then when we get there we are going to have some words.

Anyway, hope all is well, take care of my grandma

Sincerely,
Bugsy Hansen


I would like to add a few expectations for our Gram:
  • Plenty of butter pecan ice cream
  • Jane Austen...  Not only books but movies based on the books.  Every version of 'em.
  • Lots of puppies in need of snuggles.  She's pretty good at that.
  • Black Forrest gummy bears.  by the truck full.
  • Self-fluffing couch pillows.
  • Someone to go to movies with.  Preferably after having some Mexican food and margaritas.  
  • And also- she does NOT allow for sick days.  Be on your game, my man.

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